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[01 Jan 2004|01:04pm] |
I can't believe it is 2004. So many things have occured last year I don't know if I can recall them all. I'm just so happy that Andrew and I have lasted through 2 new years.
So, I had invited Brenda had invited laura over for new years. So we all decided to go to my aunt's first to see their their fireworks and eat their chinese food. The fire works get better every year. They were pretty damn loud too. Good thing the cops didn't come. She has the cutest puppies at her house. I tried to steal one but my brother's allergic reaction gave it away.
Then Amy and Sam were supost to meet us at my house but we ended up going to visit the Marcille house. never again do I want to see chris trying to get smashed on new years. It was pretty fun though. We brought them sparklers. I kinda wished I had stayed. But oh well. Maybe next year ;o)
So just Brenda, Laura,Amy, and sam headed back to my house where we watched the ball drop and did the trampoline thing.
Eventually Sam left and went back to Marcille's while we all watched some movies and fell asleep to a porno that Brenda picked out. LMAO J/K Brenda.
But it all was pretty fun. Nothing to big.
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[26 Dec 2003|10:49pm] |
it doesn't rhyme... doesn't flow.. it probably just sucks. but i felt like writing up something. this is what came out. It has nothing to do with whats going on in my life now... but its a familiar feeling. I just hope I never have to go through it again. break ups suck.
I kneel on the floor and feel the coldness from the cement seep with in me
there is no easy way to let things go
I'm willing to break my self in half just to get you to notice my pain inside
there is no easy way...
I could yell your name at the top of my lungs, cursing
rip every note you gave me, signed with a heart on the bottom
drink my tears so they wouldn't be wasted on you
but this tourtured soul will never be happy with anyone else
wondering if you'll ever think of me again
I thought you'd be apart of me forever
knowing inside you would just be wasting your youth
but when you broke it off you said it was you not me
you not me
it was me
there is no easy way...
I could yell your name at the top of my lungs, cursing
rip every note you gave me, signed with a heart on the bottom
drink my tears so they wouldn't be wasted on you
but this tourtured soul will never be happy with anyone else
I don't care if you don't love me
I'll just live with in your past for ever
linger in that twisted heart of yours
that didn't even beat for me
??????? (rips it up and throws it away)
on a lighter note.
Brenda and I went to the mall today so she could exchange some things and so i could use my gift card. :o)
Every article of guy's clothing reminds me of Andrew. I don't know why. I like stealing his clothes. Not the stores' clothes! lol.. okay i'm just being random and sappy. Need to go lay down... heheh
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(8 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[26 Dec 2003|04:38pm] |
YAY! I'm so happy. Finally I feel pretty much all better. Andrew came over yesterday. We saw The Return Of the King. Exchanged gifts ect. I couldn't be any happier. I missed him so much. He didn't even have to get me anything. Just seeing him makes me oh so happy. but he got me some pretty nice jewelry, pjs, and a sticker for my car. My Christmas was pretty good. I got a lot of money. So... now i can buy my Digital Camera :oD I just have no clue what kind to buy... I'm so excited for Europe. I'm going to take so many pictures! I got a nice suitcase for x-mas too for the trip. And my dad gave me a gas card worth $100 and John got me a cd player for my car. :o) YESSSSSSSSS!
<333333 i hope you all had a Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brenda and Laura are going to come over for New Years. It's going to be so fun.
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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| Freaked out... |
[22 Dec 2003|07:33pm] |
Okay.. so i just woke up from a 3 hour nap. I had the weirdest dream. ewwwww my eye is all puffy. :o(
anyway.
In my dream I was in Florida. I heard that free willy died so I went to this weird amusement park that i thought he lived at but no one was there except these weird girls who kept asking me where my "mommy" was. So I was like... uhm... yea... I'm going to go to work now.
then I drove to my aunt's house and it was pouring outside and I was wearing fuzzy slippers. I walked in and she had all these little kids blowing bubbles. And Mr. Gould was there teaching them. It turns out Mr. Gould was my uncle. (i think i was running a fever at this point???) haha. yea so he wanted to give me a mini van for christmas. lol. and I started crying because I couldn't except it from him. Then i woke up to me leaving and walking through a screen door.
how weird is that? I remember like everything too. Maybe its cause i woke up during it. But seriously... Mr. Gould???
Hahahaha..
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(1 squeeze | |Squeeze me|)
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[22 Dec 2003|05:06am] |
okay.. it is now 5:00 in the am... woke up at 3:30...
I have pink eye!
:o( i just want to cry. I have all these plans for christmas too. wth! why can't i even just see andrew!?!?!?!
went to the party last night. omg it was wicked funny. Some lady fell on me and spilt her beer on me..
yea..
and Dean is the only person online right now. hahaha. something is wrong with your alarm clock buddy. ;o)
nothing to do so i'm going to check his site before he threatens me on the aim.
.... :o(
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(8 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[21 Dec 2003|04:43pm] |
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I love it when my parents talk about me when I happen to be RIGHT THERE!
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[21 Dec 2003|03:39pm] |
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mood |
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 stressed |
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I just want to be with you, but I can't even do that.
I am so stressed right now. EVERYTHING is making me want to crawl under a rock and sleep my life away.
There is soooo much to make up. I miss two days of school and now i have a shit load to make up. Pluss a test and quiz. It really sucks.
I have a paper to write today but i also want to go to andrew's christmas party at his work. (since i feel like i never see him... or will again at this point)
I just want to cry. I have that stupid term paper to do also. I hate teachers, they don't even care that maybe we want a little break over Christmas.
I have to work Christmas Eve. No biggy i guess... but my dad's gunna be pissed that he has to pick me up late.
my foot fell asleep.
I got to go.
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(1 squeeze | |Squeeze me|)
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| <33333333 |
[19 Dec 2003|05:49pm] |
Mcvr4: i told jon my xmas wasn't about a list
Mcvr4: and he's like what's it about?
Mcvr4: i'm like......sarah with a big bow around her under my tree
aw! <3
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(5 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[19 Dec 2003|09:11am] |
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mood |
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 sick |
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My neighbor's son David died yesterday. I was sitting in my living room and all of a sudden i see an ambulance and two other cars parked infront of the house. At first I thought it was Jerry cause he's old.. but no. It's so sad. He was a nice guy. I guess he had a lot of problems with his health.
I'm still feeling like poo poo. I'm tired. I think i'm going to take a nap. I decided to call in. I just can't do it. my lips are all cold sored. it's gross.
I got a christmas card in the mail from my Aunt Barbara. And another letter about Chris. We decided to light 3 candles. One for him, David, and the boy who used to live across the street. I love my mom, shes the sweetest person i think i know. She keeps telling me to rest and keep drinking. Its cute, kinda annoying, but cute.
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[18 Dec 2003|04:10pm] |
I just got back from the doctors.. of course i feel a bit better than yesterday.. egh.. yesterday was terrible. But my throat is just killing me. I looked at it in the mirror and its all spotted and gross. So i just went and spent $5 so i could listen to this guy tell me that my throat looks fine. :o( right.
well.. besides my throat i'm feeling pretty good. so i guess i wont have to call in tomorrow. I'm missing out on everything. i have so much stuff to do this weekend but no time to do it. I have to wrap gifts and still go shopping. I feel horrible because I haven't even gotten friends anything.
I have to work all weekend. this makes me sad
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[17 Dec 2003|06:19pm] |
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i am so sick. i hate it. all my plans are gone. and I miss seeing andrew. why does this have to happen now. i feel as though i'm going to pass out. cold/hot flashes, headache, sore throat, puking. mmm fun.
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(6 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[17 Dec 2003|12:50pm] |
Light breaks underneath a heavy door
And I try to keep myself awake
Fall all around us on our hotel floor
And you think that you've made a mistake
And there's a pain in my stomach from another sleepless binge
And I struggled to get myself up again
I wanna hang onto something
That won't break away or fall apart
Like the pieces of my heart
And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they charter your way back home
Do you wanna leave or somethin?
reminds me of someone
And dreams came around you in a hazy rain
You opened your mouth wide to feel them fall
And I write a letter, from a one-way train
But i don't think you'll read it at all
And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they charter your way back home
Do you wanna leave or somethin?
And I can't take this anymore
Well I know that I can't take this anymore
I can't take this anymore
Cuz I know someday I'll see you walk out that door
And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
So Do you wanna leave? Do you wanna leave?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
Do you wanna leave or somethin?
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(2 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[16 Dec 2003|02:01pm] |
I have a feeling work is going to make me work till 9 because one of the cashiers is sick. I myself... feel sick.
I am out of gas. lol. i hope i can make it to a gas station. I don't think i have anymoney either. lol. hm... how about 5 cents worth of gas?
the roads still suck. The hill our school is on is crappy and the sidewalk isn't even shovelled. of course its probably all ice now. So yea... kids are under the threat of being run over.
I feel so tired. i can't function. work is going to feel long.
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(3 squeezes | |Squeeze me|)
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[10 Dec 2003|12:59pm] |
Yea.. so i really need a new lj. I made this one back in like... 7th grade. and the username was a mistake. my password became the username by mistake.. cause i always think of random things to use as passwords.. such as "fingernail". Yea so i'm just a tad embarassed by having that as my username. heheh..
I feel asleep talking to Andrew on the phone last night. I think he should call me everynight so I will sleep better.
xoxo, Sarah
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[09 Dec 2003|01:50pm] |
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mood |
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eh..
got the psat scores today.. not great...
progress report cards were today. those grades... were not so great either. got a c- in alg. 2. :o(
*sigh* not to much else to say.
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